cyclothymia

some days come with all surprises. there is no end for it. one after the other which makes you feel like a spl person, dfrnt from evryone in a out of the world way. then suddenly the next second evrythg is shattered. you are an ordinary person,actually way below ordinary that nobody even cares whtr u exist or not. the earlier out of the world experience seems like a conspiracy, a shattering of self image a suspicion on the mankind and the surrounding, doubt about future feeling of inadequacy about present. total feeling of failure which is proved by wishful thinking and wrong decisions. life moves from bad to worse and and more worse states... but then, does the same individual take pride thinking that "i told u my life is a wreck. so i am right" and hence boosting ones own self in a discreet way??? wonders of the mind, a juvenile can never understnd